When Will It Stop?
From a very young age, I was taught that to get what I wanted, I would have to work twice as hard and be twice as good.
In this simple lesson, my parents taught me that as a Black woman, the playing field would never be even. If I wanted success, I would have to fight for it.
I am exhausted.
I have gone through the education system in Canada. I know what it feels like to cling to picture books that have little Black girls in them, because they are so hard to come by. I have been moved to the back of the classroom, because it was assumed that I was only there to occupy a seat. In spite of these challenges, I persevered and will be receiving my second degree this fall. Yet, I see that none of these accolades matter.
Ahmaud Arbery was minding his own business while jogging. All it took was a few minutes, for two white men to decide he had no business in that particular neighbourhood. They shot him three times – killing him right away. At times it feels as though hundreds of Black people have been turned into hashtags in the past decade alone; yet in the case of Ahmaud, the pain feels unique because if it weren’t for outrage on social media - TWO MONTHS AFTER HIS MURDER – the killers would have never been charged and justice would never be served. Ahmaud was educated and hard-working, and despite the claims made to ruin his reputation, he had never been in any form of serious trouble with the police. In those final moments, none of that mattered. He didn’t need to be holding a weapon, because his blackness already weaponized him.
Thus, in June of 2020, I am at a loss for words. I have been here so many times. Disgusted with society on a whole. Longing for change, and honestly wondering if I will ever live to see it. I cannot string my words together in an eloquent fashion because life as a Black woman feels nothing close to eloquent.
It’s messy.
My heart hurts for Black people all over the world. We are living in a system that was never built for us. Taken from our homeland, we were brought all over the world to work as slaves to our superior white masters. BLACK PEOPLE BUILT AMERICA and yet, years later, very little has changed. Lynching has morphed from burning Black bodies on crosses to brazen murders caught on camera. The Jim Crow era is still evidenced by mass incarceration and police brutality. There is a new name every week of a Black person who has been killed as a result of racism.
We campaign and lobby peacefully for changes to legislation and justice for our fallen brothers and sisters, only to be ignored and told that changes will take time. Emmett Till was murdered 65 years ago…How much more time do we need? Technological advancement makes the issue of police brutality and dare I say white brutality unignorable. The world is watching as Black people lose their lives incessantly, yet our screams of “Black Lives Matter” are met with a rebuttal of “well yes, but what about Blue Lives?” or a popular “surely all lives matter”.
I am tired of being forced to watch Black people die in HD camera quality, only to be told months later that there was not enough evidence to bring the murderer to justice or to strip them of their badge.
Canadians feel a false sense of security at the thought that this is taking place south of the border; but it is just that, false. In Toronto, there have long been allegations of police brutality against the Black community as well as practices rooted in racism such as placing police officers (Student Resource Officers) in marginalized high schools and the issue of carding on Toronto streets. We are no better here in Canada. It does all Canadians a great disservice to bury our heads in the sand and pretend to be the Great North, as systematic racism continues to disadvantage Black Canadians (don’t even get me started on racism against Indigenous people).
My advice?
Education is the first step. George Floyd is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to understanding police brutality and racial tensions in America (and the world at large). There are countless books, documentaries, and resources put out by Black Lives Matter as well as other social groups. White Fragility: Why It's So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism by Robin Diangelo is a great novel that examines white privilege with a modern lens. When They See Us on Netflix is a tough watch but great for seeing how little has changed in America since the late eighties.
Education goes beyond reading books and watching documentaries. It is crucial that all non-Black people begin to look at ways that Black people are disadvantaged in society and use their privilege to speak out against the injustice! Allies are so important and in a crucial time like this, collective action will drive change forward. Loving Black culture is not enough – where would Black culture be without Black people? If you see something, say something.
Ahmaud Arbery deserved better. George Floyd deserved better. Going forward, Black men deserve better. Black women, like Breonna Taylor, deserve better. My Black children will one day live in this world, and they deserve better. While the media and police choose to treat Black people as criminals and ruffians, I will continue to fight tirelessly and affect change in my community.
Black people are beautiful. We are strong. We are united. There is power in our collective struggle against injustice; and no amount of ugly racism will every change my mind.
